…and it hurts. and i cry. but i know i lost nothing. i built a world of nothing, based on nothing. and no what’s left behind is a new beginning… but how. how when all of my memories are how they are. so lost. so confused. i don’t know who i am. what i want.
i’m scared… i don’t know if i have strenghts to move on… to forget. i grew sronger, but it all broke. it’s like a bad joke. a bad scenario. and i. i feel like a puppet. this was a game i did not won. i had 3 lifes, but they’ve been lost along the way… and why? because, again, i was feeding myself lies.
so many plans… now just so many tears cry over them, so much pain… i’ll have to hide, i’ll have to pretend everything’s ok. i have to… be myself? yeah. right.
like fuck no. first of all, i’ve been played.
i never expected that. and it hit me like a sky jet. because i’m a fucking dumbass… but oh well, if i wasn’t a dumbass, i wouldn’t be me.
so hard. so hard when i think about… i don’t really know.
i just wonder why.
because… it’s what i do. i can not forget what we’ve been through. what you made me feel, and you made me feel alive. when i said forever, i meant it. it’s the only thing i hold on to, and even if it takes one life stand, i won’t stop fighting to keep it, and make it happen.
you gave me a reason to want to wake up, you still do. all i know is i love you. i always did. never knowing who you are, i just fell in love with you.
…. BUT YOU HURT ME. -Never forget that…
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